I do believe I will finish this story!

Updates are comingFeeling like I can conquer! I’ve added another chapter to The Price of Living! It is called Tango Through Time and it was almost over 13,000 words before I cut it in half for not-killing-my-readers reasons.

My friends and family were, thankfully, very understanding of my absence while I spent all my free time tapping away at the keys. It is catharsis when I need it most, and this summer hasn’t been the easiest.

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This does mean chapter 26 is nearly finished as well, which is fantastic since I lost steam (nearly gave up) and wasn’t sure I could recover. The end was written ages ago, so I’m almost finished!

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Got some time in to do a bit of artwork too, which is always brilliant since work-artwork is the opposite of fun and brilliant. It’s eeeevil. It’s anti-fun and mindless, soul-sucking monotony. I often try to sneak in a Tardis here and there, like a hidden Mickey, only less hidden and more front and center, but my conscience never lets me keep it in. Damn copyrights. Anyway, nothing big, just a picture to go with the chapter, but it was fun:

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I am very pleased to be updating again, to say the least! I owe it all to your encouragement!! Thank you!!

If you are reading my silly, timey-wimey bit of madness, I sincerely hope you enjoy it! If not, I sincerely hope you enjoy your week!

…Not that you shouldn’t enjoy your week if you are reading it…

…So… everyone, enjoy your week!

Right, shutting it.

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Finally!!! Took me long enough!

Updates are coming

I am very happy to say after months of just opening the document and then looking at cat memes for hours, I have finally disciplined myself and updated my Whofic, The Price of Living! IMG_2610

The new chapter, The Black Archive, is up and available for all to read and I’m well into the next chapter with an excitement I haven’t had since I first began writing it.

Seriously, I know exactly what my issue was, and it came down to a lack of confidence that I could properly tell the story. I got mired. So I avoided and ignored it, letting what once brought me much joy become something over which I felt guilt and anxiety. I am very happy to say that I’m mostly over it.

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I really do owe this new chapter and my reawakened internal fire to the support and encouragement I’ve gotten from you wonderful people out there who read Dead and the Descendant and left me such beautiful and amazing words of encouragement.

I know it isn’t an SVM/TB story and that many of you aren’t followers of the Doctor Who fandom, but the support has been so instrumental to reconnecting to the belief in myself. Thank you. I know I say it all the time, but the truth is, I can’t say it enough. It has meant everything.

So this one goes out to you, you beautiful people! I’m in your debt as an author and I don’t know how I would’ve gotten here without you! You are the best!!

I really am beating out a samba!

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Woah…

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There’s absolutely no way I’m going to be a model employee today. I’m so thrilled that I’ve got so many people reading, and following, and leaving brilliant and amazing comments, I’m just sitting here wiggling in my seat and grinning like a fool. I feel like I want to keep looking behind me because it can’t be my story getting this much attention, it’s gotta be the writer behind me you’re waving at and I’m daydreaming! Especially on my very first fanfic!! What?! Just wow. I feel like I could dance rather than walk everywhere and I’ve got you readers to thank!! This is absolutely the best feeling in the world!!

That’s all, really. I just wanted to say thank you for your support and tell you all that, for a shy gal like me, it means so much!! I’m feeling inspired!!

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A Wolf in Skinny Jeans Seeks FF w/ Heart… And Good Grammar… Must Enjoy Nerdiness & Words

I love fan fiction.

Actually, if technically you assumed I’m totally and completely addicted and obsessed, you’d be closer to the truth. I like many of the stories I’ve read better than the original work that inspired them.

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It started with a vampire named Eric Northman, and a little fairy hybrid that made his silent heart flutter. Then the author pulled a shotgun loaded with silver shrapnel from under her petticoats and killed everything she’d set up over the last decade and proceeded to skate around in the bloody guts of my allegiance whilst singing “It’s Raining Men.” (Yeah, SVM fans, you know what I’m talking about. Your guts were there too.) Thirteen years of story… bombed with a wish.

Not that CH hadn’t upset me many times before, she had. Masterfully crafted characters were suddenly different from one book to the next, with blatant contradictions to previous books thrown in whenever it suited the new one, but one thing remained constant: Eric Northman was an incredible character. I still can’t decide if it was a fluke, or skill, but the nuances enraptured me.

So after After Dead, I was reading reviews on Amazon just to confirm that others were as outraged by the waste of time and money that the series devolved into (I’m not a bitter or angry person, but reading is my favourite and… just, no, Charlaine Harris, no,) when I came across a review with brilliant things to say about the series, and a recommendation for a fan inspired re-work of the series’ end called Dead on the Crossroads, by GoddessD.

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Now, I’ve had theatre friends reading and loving Twilight and Harry Potter fanfic for years, but since vampires don’t sparkle in the sun (they burn! come on now!) and HP is so sacred a work in my life that I’ve needed to ink its importance into my skin in a permanent way, fanfic was always a step too far in my snobby-literature-needs-a-proper-publisher brain.

But. I. Was. WROOOOOONG. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, and I have zero problem saying it.

Reading Dead on the Crossroads changed the game completely. I was hooked. Blown away by the underground talent. It felt like the first time someone played me music by my favourite inde rock band. I couldn’t believe how raw and powerful it could be. Popularity didn’t matter, what mattered were the themes explored. And they could make me think and stay with me for days!

Maybe it was a ‘right head-place at the right time’ since my disappointment with CH was bordering outrage and Winds of Winter wouldn’t be out until, well, whenever George RR Martin puts it out, and I’d literally gone through every book I owned at least twice (including the bedside stack of ‘I want to read these because they cost next-to-nothing at the used book shop,’) but after I flew through that first one, I found myself greedily devouring more and more and more, branching into other genres and fandoms until I felt an urge that I tried for many years of late to ignore.

I had my own story to tell.

Strike that. I had a story to tell about characters that were not my own. First time ever that’s happened to me!

Again, I rebelled. I couldn’t write fan fiction! Nooooo. I had at least four other unfinished novels or scripts on my hard drive that had been neglected for years. If I started an EN story, I’d never finish it anyway, so what was the point? And work often saps my creativity with its demands on my muse and the drudgery of nit-picking grammar; history would only repeat itself and why would anyone want to read my writing anyway? I’m no one. I don’t have a body of existing work that others love, nor am I socially active or connected on FF forums. Even if I told my story, no one would care.

I just ignored it. I let the plot bunnies use my head as a warren for months until I had to get a little out for closure on the story that had so disappointed me. I needed Sookie to write a letter to Eric.

So I did.

And I couldn’t stop.

I wrote for three months in my spare time (it was always in the middle of the night, or when I was alone in the office at work, shhhh, I am a very diligent employee most of the time, but when the words come, they come.)

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I still don’t know what possessed me to first publish it on Fanfiction.net. I usually stay as private as possible in my day to day. I don’t chat on the phone, I rarely use social media, I don’t go out with work colleagues, I find even writing to others directly very hard, and even in my little village, no one really knows me as anything other than the lady that smiles at everyone but doesn’t talk much. I’ve had the same five besties all my life (though I’ve moved far away and we rarely see each other now) and in the last ten years of singledom, I’ve dated three people. Well, dated sort of. Went on dates with. Only one with regularity and that was over as soon as it got serious more quickly than I was ready for. In other words I’m shy. Introverted in an extreme way. And shy. There’s a difference. And I’m both. So publishing Dead and the Descendant was scary and I’d never have done it if I wasn’t assured my anonymity. WolvesHaveReturned became my safety blanket and quasi-superhero alias. In anonymity, I could be a woman with courage. I could be a wolf that howled to the moon and let her voice be heard by members of her fandom pack across the globe.

And you know what?

Somehow, you heard me.

I’d been silent and wandering for years, and you heard me within months of finally finding my voice.

And I don’t regret it. I don’t think I could even go back if I wanted to. I’ve never had the support and encouragement (and from total strangers with zero obligation to me or my feelings!) that I’ve gotten over the last year. It’s incredible and a little bewildering. I’m constantly unsure whether I should retreat a bit more back into my safety zone, or come out a little further and interact. So I’m timidly taking steps away from my cave if only to say:

Thank you.

Thank you for the bright spot in my life that I had no idea was missing.

Thank you to the writers who have given me hours/weeks/months of joy with your work.

Thank you to the betas who keep OCD editors from going barmy with typo obsessions or grammatical misguidance, and the support and encouragement they give to their authors that keeps them giving us new stories to read.

Thank you to the readers, whether silent-ne’er-reviewers, encouraging, outspoken, skeptical, or gushing, genius demands audience in any medium and the more you read, the more I can read too.

Thank you to the fandom devotees that take time out of their lives to moderate, compile, build, and direct websites that allow us direct access to fics, pics, memes, humor, forums, each other, and all manner of media.

Thank you.

I’m so grateful for what you’ve all brought into my life.

I’ll keep howling if you will.

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The Eld (The Group Home Goddess and How I Quit Smoking) New story by Tiel Kinsner

The Eld (The Group Home Goddess and How I Quit Smoking) is my new work of fiction.

I’d love to hear thoughts from any that read it!

Our heroine, Celine, is a misfit twenty-something with a colorful past, a bad Xanax habit, and a big secret that could help change the course of the future on Earth. Come play with her and her little band of heroes as she shakes off the shackles of a troubled past and finds herself nose deep in a celestial power struggle as old as the heavens.

Read here:

https://wolveshavereturned.wordpress.com/the-eld-group-home-goddess-and-how-i-quit-smoking/

Dead and the Descendant a Sookie Stackhouse/SVM (Eric Northman) Story

Dead and the Descendant, a Southern Vampire Mysteries/Sookie Stackhouse novels fan fiction about my favorite vamp, Eric Northman, is now completely uploaded and available for your pleasure here!

http://wolveshavereturned.wordpress.com/dead-and-the-descendant/